Controlling Holiday Depression

This is the day which the Lord hath made;

we will rejoice and be glad in it.

Psalm 118:24

A few years ago, I spoke with a friend who has been involved in the funeral industry for several years. In the course of conversation, I asked this person if there is one particular time of the year that seems to be consistently the busiest week or month in their funeral business.  My friend told me that January was the month that for their business ranked #1 by far according to office records. When I asked the reasons, as if I didn't have some idea already, I was told that in our day, a strong emphasis on holiday's begins the first of October and lasts through New Years Day. It's on New Years day that some people wake up in the pit of depression...no more parties, no more elaborate food, no gifts to unwrap, Santa isn't present in stores for children to sit on his lap, decorations look old, stale and tacky, Christmas cards lose meaning, school programs are done and over with and the mall no longer seems the place to be. There are folks who struggle with the loss of loved ones through death or alienation of some sort. Some who already have serious emotional problems, find everything compounded and they seek an easy way out...suicide. There are also house fires, car accidents, crime victims in goodly number in January along with natural death events.

All of us have felt some of those things at one time or another and would never consider suicide, but for some people, it's been a reality. We look back to November 1 and wonder where time went. We soon find we are waking up and it's a new year. We glance back at recent, happy days of smiles, singing, giving and now, it's like we are left with an empty bag, the victim of a pretty lousy joke. The why's of all of this I think are two fold but in both cases, we are very much in control whether we believe it or not.

I have a favorite craft store I love that would be very familiar in name to most. When Halloween décor was out in full bloom, Thanksgiving things were almost mixed in with all of the orange, black and pumpkins. Pumpkins do overlap into both holidays. Then bumping up against those shelves and into a corner, there began the Christmas tree décor, not yet in full display but the beginnings. Have you noticed the big emphasis on Halloween these days? Even adult costumes are a huge business. So lets say that from October 1 through January 1, we are taken on a wild ride of holiday madness because of what various industries put us through. We are bombarded with TV ads, fliers in our mailboxes, adds on our computers, etc. So through the industry, we are exposed to all of the latest of everything from costumes to hand held electronic devices. It's all paraded before us doing all that can be done to make us feel guilty that we are depriving loved ones of joy and happiness if we don't indulge in the purchase of each advertisers wares. There's nothing we can do about the industry. It's their job to sell things, to make every item look its best and its most inviting

There are parties and programs to attend and for about three months, people are in a holiday frenzy that won't quit. It's almost a kind of narcotic high...a high that can take us where we don't want to go or causes us to be who we don't want to be. Soon, we are sitting almost in a daze the first week in January. There's nothing left in the way of activity, parties, spending and there are people who go into the deepest of depression at that time. Nothing will tell us who we are like sitting alone, after the activity is gone and all the lights have been turned out.

So what are some practical things to do:

Keep Jesus in the season. He should be a part of Thanksgiving as well as Christmas. This takes some planning. When planning holiday activities, don't shove church events to the bottom of the list. The things that go on at church should take priority.

We should turn a lot of things off in our thinking and have a determination to maintain a sanity with our family in mind. In it all, children are watching and learning from we parents what is really important about the holidays. Few families even discuss in days leading up to and during Thanksgiving Day those things we should be grateful for. Few families concentrate on those less fortunate at Christmas. Some feel they've done their fair share if they drop a dollar into a Salvation Army bucket.

There are many opportunities over the holidays for children to do things for others. Nothing will kill depression like jumping in with both feet to do for others. On Thanksgiving Day a little over a week ago, I wanted to take a dinner to a lady in our church I knew would be alone. I asked my two oldest grandboys (ages 5 & 3) who were here if they wanted to go with me to deliver dinner to a lady. They busied themselves making a nice card for her. When we got to her very small, humble residence, each boy carried some of the food into the house. They gave this lady hugs and before we left, we held hands with her and I prayed for her. The boys were somewhat quiet on the way home but asked several questions about the lady. I think the trip left an impression on them. I believe it was their mom who said that she didn't think the boys had done anything like that before. Come up with something children in the family can do for others during the Christmas holiday time. It will leave more of an impression on them than one can believe.

Maintain as much of a normal schedule as possible during holiday times, especially with children in the home. Children don't do well when everything is in an up-heaval for extended periods of time. They still need regular meals and consistent bedtimes as much as possible.

Don't fall for all the holiday and commercial hype. It's our fault for being holiday dupes. We can say “no” to many of the requests that come our way. We need a plan if we are going to maintain some kind of sanity in all of these days of glitz and glitter. This is only the first of December. This is the time to sit down and decide how much we will be involved in holiday festivities...what parties will we attend, what our Christmas budget will be, what useful and practical gifts will we purchase, etc. Without a plan, we can fall into a holiday and financial abyss that we can't crawl out of.

After a huge holiday, have something else planned a day or two afterward for the family to enjoy. Having something to look forward to after a big Christmas day can take the edge off of the holiday let down.

Let's remember that “Jesus is the reason for the season.” Never thought I would type that sentence as I really don't care for it because it's become glib, trite and really doesn't mean much to people. The statement is true but our actions that back the statement are often weak at best. If you have a pin with that saying, wear it. It is a witness and testimony.

In Psalm 118, we are shown the importance of one day and that is the present day we are living in. It doesn't speak of yesterday or tomorrow but stresses THIS day. God doesn't play favorites with days. Every day is important to Him. He wants the best from us on THIS day. With Jesus at the center of our lives EVERYDAY, we can handle the big and small events of life whether they be joyous or troubled. God is the creator and controller of our days. He wants everyday to be of major importance to us because THIS is the day He's ordained for you and me. I can give a gift to someone TODAY...I can send someone a card TODAY...I can even eat turkey and dressing TODAY if I want to...I can sing “Joy to the World” TODAY and can offer my praise, thanksgiving and appreciation to God and others TODAY. Holidays will come and go but our Father is interested in what we do with every TODAY, no matter the date.

Father, thank You for sending Jesus, Your Son in human form. I'm not thankful for that just at this time of year. I'm grateful everyday for the salvation He made possible for me. Help me to make the very best of every day here on earth. Help me also to be generous with my time and effort in serving You and others. I love You....Amen.